May09

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GOP 53

Malicious Compliance: Teachers Know How to Trigger Conservatives

Yesterday, in an item about right-wingers trying to use the educational system to indoctrinate students, we wrote this:

Now, in some cases, a rule or a standard is not optional for teachers—for example, the new Louisiana rule about posting the Ten Commandments in classrooms. It is for this circumstance that malicious compliance was created—follow the letter of the law, but not the spirit. There are all kinds of ways to pull this off, as an educator. Indeed, we are reminded that several readers wrote in to ask us what WE would do if required to display the Ten Commandments in our classroom. We were at work on our answer, but didn't get it finished, and then the endless march of BIG NEWS intervened. Maybe we'll try to get back to it for tomorrow's posting, as an illustration of what we mean by malicious compliance.

If ever there was a day to deliver on that promise, it's the day that a new pope was chosen. And so, to start, note that the size constraints of a website don't really allow us to give an exact representation of what we have in mind. However, the plan would be a chart. The top row of the chart would be a list of what might be called "issues"—for example, "idolatry," "respect for ancestors," "lying," "false gods," etc. The far-left column would be a list of major religious traditions. And then each quadrant would be filled in with scripture, wherever there is a match.

For example, consider a column with the header "murder." That column might be filled in something like this:

• Hinduism: "He who commits murder must be considered as the worst offender, more wicked than a defamer, than a thief, and than he who injures with a staff." (Laws of Manu 8:345)
  
  
• Judaism: "You shall not murder." (Exodus 20:13)
  
  
• Confucianism: "In wars to gain land, the dead fill the plains; in wars to gain cities, the dead fill the cities. This is known as showing the land the way to devour human flesh. Death is too light a punishment for such men." (Mencius IV.A:14)
  
  
• Buddhism: "Whoever, seeking his own happiness, harms with the rod other pleasure-loving beings, experiences no happiness hereafter." (Dhammapada 129:32)
  
  
• Taoism: "He who delights in the slaughter of men will not succeed in the empire." (Tao Te Ching 31)
  
  
• Christianity: "You shall not murder." (Exodus 20:13)
  
  
• Islam: "Do not take life—which God has made sacred—except for just cause. And if anyone is slain wrongfully, we have given his heir authority to demand retribution; but let him not exceed bounds in the matter of taking life, for he is helped by the law." (Surah Al-Isra 17:33)

Note that religions are listed in order of age, from oldest to youngest. Obviously, additional religions would be included; we're just trying to keep this manageable for illustrative purposes.

Here's one other sample column; this one would have the header "suffering":

• Hinduism: "While we are still here, we have come to know the eternal self. If you've not known it, great is your destruction. Those who have known it—they become immortal. As for the rest—only suffering awaits them." (Bṛhadāraṇyaka Upaniṣad 4.4:14)
  
  
• Judaism: "The crucible is for silver, and the furnace is for gold, and the Lord tests hearts." (Proverbs 17:3)
  
  
• Confucianism: "If courageous people suffer from poverty, they'll soon tear the country apart. Unless they've mastered Humanity, anyone whose sufferings are great would tear it apart with abandon." (Analects VII:10)
  
  
• Buddhism: "Of paths, the Path of Eight Constituents is the noblest; of truths, the Four Noble Truths are the noblest; of the teachings on Buddha, the absence of craving (i.e., Nibbana) is the noblest; of the two-legged beings, the All-Seeing Buddha is the noblest.
  
  "This is the only Path, and there is none other for the purity of vision. Follow this Path; it will bewilder Mara.
  
  "Following this Path, you will make an end of suffering. Having myself known the Path which can lead to the removal of the thorns of moral defilements, I have shown you the Path.
  
  "You yourselves should make the effort; the Tathagatas (Buddhas) only can show the way. Those who practice the Tranquillity and Insight Meditation are freed from the bond of Mara." (Dhammapada: 273-276)
  
  
• Taoism: "Follow your path to the end
  
  "Accept difficulty as an opportunity
  
  "This is the sure way to end up with no difficulties at all" (To Te Ching: 63)
  
  
• Christianity: "Many are the afflictions of the righteous, but the Lord delivers him out of them all." (Psalm 34:19)
  
  
• Islam: "And We will surely test you with something of fear and hunger and a loss of wealth and lives and fruits, but give good tidings to the patient... Who, when disaster strikes them, say, 'Indeed we belong to Allah, and indeed to Him we will return." (Surah Al-Baqarah: 155-156)

That certainly gives a sense of things. In a complete chart, all Ten Commandments would make an appearance, along with a fair bit of non-Commandment material. And, by citing them by verse, it even avoids the problem of showing favoritism to one sect's list of the Commandments over another's (for example, "You shall not murder" is the Fifth Commandment for Roman Catholics and Lutherans; the Sixth Commandment for most Jews and Eastern Orthodox Christians; and the Eighth Commandment for most Protestants).

And this is not only malicious compliance, it's also a case of taking lemons and making lemonade. Such a chart could be the basis for discussions about points of agreement between religious traditions, and why those points of agreement exist, as well as variances in the ways the various religious traditions see some things, and what the implications of those variances are. Depending on how old the students are, one could also assign each of them to research a specific verse on the chart, and to do a brief presentation on the verse, and how it fits in with the chapter/book/surah it came from.

After yesterday's posting went live, we heard from numerous readers, many of them teachers, about their ideas. We thought we'd share some of those; as you can see, our readers are quite fluent in the language of malicious compliance:

• B.C. in Walpole, ME: I was reminded of the time some years ago when the state of Pennsylvania decreed that all schools would require students to stand up and say the Pledge of Allegiance to the Flag [Why allegiance to the flag, not the Constitution, or the USA?], with an escape clause: or else play the National Anthem.
  
  I didn't walk, I ran to the Upper School Director's office to plead for the Jimi Hendrix Woodstock rendition of "The Star Spangled Banner," malicious compliance at its best.
  
  Rather like submitting to the Friday Electoral-Vote.com headline contest 24 hours late, I dashed in through the doorway and the director said, "I know. Jimi Hendrix. You didn't get here first with the suggestion. In fact, I thought of it myself."
  
  In the end, the school's chorale group recorded a gorgeous version and it was played every morning at 8 a.m. until the Pennsylvania Supreme Court declared the law unconstitutional.
  
  
• J.M. in Sewickley, PA: Two ideas: (1) Post them in the original Hebrew, or (2) so everybody can read them... in Braille!
  
  
• D.A. in Long Beach, CA: Malicious compliance on the Ten Commandments is easy. Post the Ten Commandments... and then place a trash can or potted plant in front of them.
  
  
• A.G. in Scranton, PA: I would post a postage-stamp-sized version of them somewhere behind that obligatory, unfinished painting of Washington.
  
  If I was a kindergarten teacher, the Ten Commandments would be posted in the attached bathroom, one commandment on every sheet of toilet paper.
  
  
• G.S. in Princeton, MA: Post the Ten Commandments in Esperanto.
  
  
• E.B. in Denver, CO: My daughter's kindergarten teacher is no nationalist, and was happy to teach kids how to read without exalting the State. He was told, sorry, but he must display the American flag in the classroom. So, he went out and bought 193 small flags, one for every country in the world—the U.S. included—and strung them all up around the room!
  
  
• K.F.K. in Cle Elum, WA: So many ways to be subversive and me, just an former elementary teacher. Here's a few ideas I came up with in about 2 minutes because I'm short on time today: (1) Post them in classical first--millennium Hebrew so there can be no translation errors; (2) post them with tenets from other world religions as a lesson in moral codes around the world; (3) post them in the teacher's closet.
  
  
• J.S. in Minneapolis, MN: "The news cycle ate our homework" is a beautiful example of malicious compliance! Even if other examples are forthcoming. Tiny fonts, wrong language, red-pen markup, an endless parade of plausible excuses—so many delightful opportunities.

As you can see, quite a few readers caught our basic drift. (Z)