Dem
47
GOP
53
Yesterday, Vice President J.D. Vance visited Fort Campbell in Kentucky, home base of the famed 101st Airborne Division. Naturally, he gave a little rah-rah speech. However, he could not control himself, and so went off the rah-rah script for a couple of minutes, to launch into an extended harangue about... turkey.
Vance started with some audience participation, asking the assembled soldiery "Who really likes—be honest with yourself—who really likes turkey?" This is a very good public speaking strategy, as it gets people involved and keeps up their interest level. However, after a bunch of people raised their hands, Vance had this to say:
You're all full of shit. Everybody who raised your hands. Think about it. And here's how I know that every single one of you who raised your hand is lying to me. How many times do you roast an 18-pound turkey just randomly? Just, you know, a nice summer afternoon, we're gonna go get an 18-pound turkey. Nobody does it because turkey doesn't actually taste that good.
But on Thanksgiving, on the most American holiday... we're gonna cook a turkey, by God, because that's what Americans do. We cook this gigantic American bird, and we do all kinds of crazy things to make it taste good.
Vance also added that, for his part, he's going to be deep-frying the family turkey this year.
We write this story up for one reason: It's yet another reminder that he is SO BAD at this. Look, we get the bit. Say something a little edgy, subvert expectations, get some laughs, yada, yada, yada. It's right out of the Jerry Seinfeld playbook. But Vance made it very awkward by telegraphing what was coming, with the whole "be honest with yourself" part. That makes the audience anxious, because that makes them unsure if they are supposed to raise their hands or not, and whether or not a particular choice will make them look stupid.
Further, this particular bit only works if you pick on something where a lot of people have said "Wait, why DO we eat that?" For example, it would work with Necco wafers, or Brussels sprouts, or cow tongue. But turkey? We would bet the percentage of people who like turkey is considerably greater than the percentage who dislike it. Plus, going after turkey on the day before Thanksgiving? That's like ranting about how stupid fireworks are on July 3, or trashing Halloween costumes on October 30. Bad timing, man. And that's before we consider that by the time Vance had decided to treat the crowd to his comedy stylings, he already knew about the National Guard shootings.
For some politicians, the "I'm a regular guy" vibe comes naturally. Think Ronald Reagan, Bill Clinton, or Barack Obama. For others, it's a bit of a struggle. And for a few, it's an ENORMOUS struggle. Vance, in service of his enormous ambition, wants so very badly to be relatable. But the gap between "how hard he's trying" and "how well he's succeeding" is as large as it has been for any politician since Richard Nixon. Of course, Nixon managed to get himself elected nonetheless, because of his strengths in other areas. As we have written many times, including earlier this week, we don't think Vance's chances of doing the same are as good. (Z)